Me too. I'd like to spend all next summer high and drunk and riding ponies and boys.
So this girl in my math class just went to the bathroom, tampon in hand, comes back with it still in her hand starts digging around in her purse, takes her thing of birthcontrol out, goes oh fuck, and downs the rest of the pills. Got to love college.
He was like an evil genius with the clitoris. I don't stand a chance.
she was seriously choking and the whole time all he kept saying was "that's what she said"
That bad?
Full length cargo pants, running shoes, and a partial unibrow. Alcohol really is blinding.
You were walking around with a baby carrier pretending your vodka was a baby. You tried to get pictures on santas lap
Next time I say "Watch this" Get me the fuck out of the bar.
I can't believe you broke a Paula dean wooden spoon over my ass
He's just so adorable. And I don't want to fuck someone who's adorable.
I needed that adderall to break my tradition of passing out at the bar on Sundays
I just saw two homeless guys bond over the fact that they both use Crown Royal bags as wallets in Burger King.
Sundays were made for eating Ramen pantless in bed.
Do normal couples celebrate occasions naked with Chicken McNuggets and BBQ sauce?
he just asked me that if he was a penguin and I was a penguin if I would fuck him
No one can explain why there is Dora the Explorer shampoo in my shower...
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