White coat. Heels.
I was just about to go down on her when she gave herself a "smell check" and said "no, not today".
I told her at least we still had each other. That's when she started crying.
Nothing good has ever or will ever come from 50 cent beers at the bowling alley..
Hey super random I have you in my phone as "downtown likes to go fishing girl" haha does that sound like you
She found my old SD card with stuff I "didn't keep" or "didn't record us doing".... She's pissed but really horny. Did I just win at sex?
Dont even get me started. you fell asleep in my kitchen after being cockblocked when you tried to use my roommates bedroom.
The hardest part about being a child of divorce is when you're at your dad's house but your condoms are at your mom's house.
I'm pretty sure male strippers are the last things I need in my life right now.
I repeat do not go to a jail visit drunk, those stools are easy to fall off.
He's tiny, but ripped. Like a stacked hobbit. He's going to pull our sexy, crime-fighting rickshaw.
there is partying, then there is whatever we did last night.
She gave me a collar. When I asked what this was for she replied "I'm taming your dick"
I have to stop at Sheetz to put my bra back on before I meet you hold on
Is it bad that I'm not at all bothered by the fact that to some people I'm simply known as the girl that takes her shirt off?
Randomize
