ohhhh fuckk. chicks a dude.
Yeah. I hotboxed a windbreaker.
so i gave him head in the movie theater last night. thought we were alone til I heard the clapping from the other side of the theater after he'd finished.
Ahhh November 1st. National Untagging Day
i just wasnt prepared to have the baby of one of two french firemen. threesomes are too confusing.
You owe me $8 for the carwash I needed after you threw the salmon on my windshield.
I just let my hand run under cold water for five minutes. I couldn't stop staring at it and the only things I could think about were how amazing it felt, how cool water was, and what a wonderful world it is that we live in. Reasons why I don't smoke...
I'm 50% weirded out and 50% into it
"you can only have my number if you answer all the questions on this trivial pursuit card correctly"
As I read your response saying I need a tan before I can become a go-go dancer, a girl cane up to work and gave me 10 coupons for 100 days of tanning for a dollar.
This is fate. You were destined to be a stripper.
You very well can't change your mind now. It would upset the natural flow of life.
Honestly who turns down a free blowjob?
Waking up next to a guy you don't remember going home with and the first thing you say is: where is my tiara? = successful birthday
What happened last night? I'm too scared to get out of bed and see the destruction.
First of all, check to see if that naked guy is still alive. He didn't look to be breathing when I left
He ate me out in a golf cart while I watched the sunset. You are so right, golf skirts do provide amazing access.
He stopped the gas pump at 69 and gave me my receipt. He wants it.
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