I just spent the last hour spooning with my drug dealer.
I'm making progress with her.. She actually looked at me today and gave me a dirty look. Things are going real good.
She really thought E.D. was a sexually position.
There's a girl in my class named "La-a" pronouced "Luh Dash uh" I hate everyone
This house was built for laser tag.
why is allison so mad at me??
me and her walked into dans and you yelled "hello my dear alli, you're looking mighty overweight today!".
crap..
I saw Winona at my church today. She has boobs, now.
Miracles do happen.
i just sold back the books i vomitted on
he proposed by singing a showtune... he might as well have had a cock in his mouth at the time
Congratulations, you have helped solved the mysterious disapperance of Dani's phone which was found in the munchies cabinet next to the oreos. Your reward is star power as well as a fat ass bowl of Nebula. You may proceed through the wardrobe and into Narnia for your prize.
I was high last night eating a fudge bar and making eggs with toast and corned beef hash for a 2 am snack and my dad asked what I was and the only reply I could think of was "I'm an adult."
ROB LOWE. SO BEAUTIFUL. SO DOUCHEY. SO HARD TO SPELL HIS NAME WHEN DRUNK.
don't bring your nerd jargon into this conversation about my naked body
And also ice skating can blow me. Goodnight, love you!
Woke up naked with a post-it that said "don't ask questions" on my ass...i know im not supposed to ask but uhm what did I do?
Randomize
