Defrosting my mini wheats in the microwave was a bad choice
He had an itunes playlist named "def not Glee season 1" which contained all of Glee season 1
I don't know how many crown and cokes he went through but I know it was more that I have fingers. We are never leaving Texas.
just threw up on my speech test, so much for a great semester
Guess who just hooked up with the cop that fingerprinted her?
Remember when I booked a hotel room for next sat? Nneither do I.
I think mounting someone proves who's house this is
Ew. After that you just pretty much proved that your vagina is the reason why my vagina needs two toilet seat covers when peeing in public restrooms
She just causally held my limp dick in her hand the entire movie. Her parents were cuddling on the couch too..that brave!
How long is enough time to schedule homosexual exploration... Like an hour?
Been trying to fuck him since december. Finally got him into bed and he was uncircumcised. Why do bad things happen to good people?
Yes, yes I will fake crap in his house for you.
I've been smoking weed using candles all week and I just found a lighter. This may truly be the happiest moment of my life. It's embarrassing how excited I got
So somehow today's lecture on the immune system turned into me having to stand up and explain female ejaculation to the class.
Ok. I'm gonna smoke some weed and look at some elephants without you then.
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