so my bro's bff came over...we had an awkward "yeah we fucked and can fuck later, but let's just pretend it didn't happen in front of the family" hug.
Just saw a guy at the gas station legitimately dressed in exactly what my costume was last night. Fuck his life.
I hate to say it, but I think my pandora being Marvin Gaye love songs was the prime reason for the bj last night
when she was 9 she got kicked out of our 4-H camp dance for pole dancing on the spirit stick
She drove all the way from Austin to have sex with me. I think it's a safe assumption my dick will have an easy life in college.
Please high five our old drug dealer for me please.
But the drunk streaking fizzled when one of jake's friends took a piss while running with a massive erection.
At my eighteen year old cousin's wedding. Getting hit on by a 9 year old. No one knows who he came with. I'm pretty sure he just showed up from the field behind the church. Help.
Found your counterpart from cali. Walked into the bar we were in with milk and a donut, ordered a beer and said anything his group wanted was on his tab....dangerous
GOD DAMMIT TARYN WHY DO WE ALWAYS HAVE TO ROB PLACES IN OUR FUTURE PLANS?!
I just sent my ex off to a party, threw a condom at him, and told him to make good choices.
I just smoked a joint and ate a sandwich while watching someone get arrested. Bonnaroo is a silly place.
Still riding the magical train of drugs so, yeah, Id say I feel great
He talked me out going to the bar. No one ever talks me out going to the bar..this is fucking love.
Omfg 7 hour sex session who am I?
PS: I think I'm in love
Ability to walk tomorrow tbd
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