Does getting a boner while watching the celtic women sing opera on ETV make me cultured?
Like many of my risky ideas this has "burned genitals" written all over it
Def drinking wine from a 4 liter jug at 11 am. If i call you in 20 years talking about 12 steps, please trace is back to this moment.
She says I'm cute and I remind her of her brother. She's too hot to back out now. I don't know. I'm guna go for it.
I meant to tell you earlier: bad life decision saturday has been moved wednesday this week
there are 5 pictures on my phone from last night, 4 are too blurry to recognize and the 5th is you dangling a twizzler over your mouth, naked.
My dads not up on pop culture but he's not dumb enough to believe your 2 girls 1 cup reference at dinner was from the bible.
A beer is a heart your wish makes!!!
If I come home tho and find u passed out naked in my bed with the bottle of crown empty, we're gonna have issues.
I'm sorry, I can't help the fact that I like to sleep naked, and I like booze, together it looks bad, yes.
Broeke and glass. I feel so and. Appilogixe in morbing.
I think we need to have a day of drinking in classes. I know we don't share any, but sacrifices need to be made.
I'm so high. Midnight pancake breakfast in bed
Our DD will meet us there. The strippers are sending a limo to pick him up. He promised them New Years Eve massages. Said he would still drive us home.
Hold on...did you Instagram a picture of you and your boyfriend while you were sending me dirty snapchats?
It feels appropriate that the wallet of my high school and college years would die at the hands of a spilled bong. Which in and of itself is a solid metaphor for those years.
Randomize
