I know I'm not learning anything when I can't even spell the name of the class I'm taking
i no longer even have beer goggles. i'm pretty sure i blacked out and had beer lasik.
dont worry about it. i always have emergency bong water with me
We always say that. And then its 4am and someone is screaming at strippers.
I told him i wanted to be exclusively cheating with him
quit making up holidays to get me to go drinking with you
Is 9am too early to be eating a mozzarella stick I found in my purse? Yeah didnt think so. The fact that it tastes like vomit is concerning but not importanta.
Well it was tamer than the 4th of july when I blew that guy I met walking home from the fireworks
Having a man strip on demand was an awesome way to start birthday. What more could a girl ask for? U the best!
Can't a woman sleep on the floor in her own apartment in peace without being judged?
I just literally had a dance party in my closet. I've never been this blazed.
I woke up and discovered I gave new meaning to the term "pizza pockets" yes it's exactly like it sounds like
we should definitely drink gin again. soon.
You said you liked how I put the cream cheese on.
Told my fifteen year old cousin's friend what to sext his girlfriend last night. He was scarred for life but she fucking loved it.
You drank whiskey for 9 hours and did not eat anything.Nothing good was going to come from that.
Randomize
