UPDATE: In a passionate fit of self love, I brought myself to orgasm under the moon on my 7th floor balcony, ejaculating between the rungs towards the ground.
Unfortunately, I did not realize that most of it would end up on the balcony below mine.
At least you don't cum in color.
They made the rule if I caught the ball with my cleavage they would drink the entire beer pong table. I don't think they expected me to actually do it.
I don't think she can come out, she went too hard in the Intro to Theater Drinking Game at 2:30
she said she wouldn't go home with me until she looked up my name in her sex offender app. do i really give off that vibe?
Yeah. It's not just the beard either.
She's going to hate me
Yeah well one of her many personalities always hates you.
The rest will just start to agree
also new logic of mine : I fuck a Scottish kid , Scotland national animal is a Unicorn airgo I've come close to fucking a unicorns descendent, mother always said dreams come true
I literally can not watch Thor without thinking of your dick
i guess she just walked over ass naked and peed on his laptop. gonna call an over price on that drunk sex.
Heyyyy, naked guy in your kitchen, can i ask you a quick question about a legal situation in pb??
So, I woke up under a table with an alarm clock on my face, my hair in a bag of popcorn, and my phone charger wrapped around me.. what happened?
Just found a handle of Tito's in my TV stand
Can't recall when I put that there, but let's goooo
One day I'm going to get tired of waking up and wondering where the glow sticks on the floor came from.
His dick is social distance approved
Social distance approved?
big enough for me to fuck from six feet away
Did I tell you I drunk fucked my one roommate last week
Uh no
This is going to be so stupid, but do you feel the calluses on my hands when I give you a handy?
Randomize
