The whole way homeyou were flapping your arms up and down, and when I asked why you said you were trying to tell Tony Danza about the angels.
I put cups full of chips next to every bed, couch, and toilet so that everyone could have a snack when they woke up....
you spent the night getting lap dances from a stripper with a c-section scar then ended up at a one room casino by the airport and you say you're too good to blaze and see pirahna 3d? bullshit
ya, but you'll graduate college with a higher education. I'm looking at at least two addictions, an abortion, and a few weeks jail time.
you were cooking a hot pocket with a grill lighter what did you want me to do
like the only thing i remember is bringing a piece of toast to the bar...
You can buy vodka at target here.. Maybe Missouri isn't so bad after all
New development. Drinking at work is so easy and awesome I might have to do it everyday.
JOY: That feeling when you crack open a handle for the first time, and the flow limiter comes off with the cap.
she just called me the flavor packet to her ramen noodles. get me the fuck out of here.
I've counted 3,503 loops of fabric on my carpet so far. FUCK YOU ACID!!!
His mom finally got over her shame and smoked a bowl with us. Merry Christmas to all aka me.
Y'know i appreciate how accepting you are of me being a terrible person.
Did we just second hand smoke crack?
She dated an Australian guy or some dude with an accent. Normal guys don't stand a chance.
CHALLENGE ACCEPTED.
Randomize
