I'm sitting at the gyno watching cnn in the waiting room
Everyone is walking funny when they come out, ugh I'm not looking forward to this
plans for tonight: dress up like pirates, drink a bottle of mad dog and watch the sorostitues across the street get naked. and yes, the mad dog part is already in play. hurry the fuck up. i look like a loser doing this alone.
this whole healthcare thing got me thinking.. without knowing it my parents are now going to be paying for my dealer to be able to live..
she tried giving me head in the pool. it was more entertaining than pleasurable
After giving the pizza guy directions you told him to look for the big stupid looking kid outside in purple
i have learned 4:30 is too early to start pregamming for the midnight harry potter
I'd like to be considered more than just his fuck buddy thanks. IVE BEEN RISKING PREGNANCY FOR SEVEN GODDAMN MONTHS I DESERVE THE TITLE OF GIRLFRIEND
And then the lady sheeps would bring me the finest grass to eat cuz im the sheep king and id have sexy smooth sheep fur
It was an 11am booty call. We were both out of our element.
Today's forecast is horny with strong chance of booty calls. Low of Craigslist cruising, and a high of climaxing in a stranger's bed.
PS- I just ordered a two man zebra costume. Would you like to be my back end?
Dude, we apparently put a washing machine drum in that back of your truck with the full intention of making a bonfire in it.
What's the procedure for answering a booty call from someone under house arrest?
We had a moment of silence for all of the orgasms he gave me with his beard before he shaved it off.
And what in gods fuck were you drinking. It tasted like windex with a mixture of juce
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