He ripped my extensions out during sex, not noticing until this morning when he saw them on the floor. I told him they werent mine and he went and threw them in his sister's room.
were with a gay guy with a minnesota accent. think about how funny that sounds.
the caf people were giving us weird looks and she yelled ITS A LIFE STYLE
I was so drunk, I was kissing everyone. Their sexual preference was none of my concern.
how the hell did this chicken wing end up in my cast?!
I swear my vagina formed calluses just to deal with how big he is
Mixed review. I fucked her in the river, but then we were assaulted by ducks.
I am the sex elephant in the room. Again.
I just walked in on my sixteen year old sister soaking her tampon in vodka. I go to Berkeley. And they think she's the good daughter.
Btw "you gettin a workout in" isn't a great gym pickup line. Like no I'm fucking grabbing lunch on my way to class.
It's times when I'm naked but also want to be platonically social that I miss you the most.
He's not very smart so he didn't know I was yelling at him with monologues from Scandal.
I think I've done enough damage with my vagina as of late, thank you
Stopping for a booty call on the way to a lunch date... Bad form?
I'm hung over and my mom made me go to church. I feel like such a sinner.
I need an aspirin and some dignity.
Randomize
