I have a pretty basic diameter of my vaginal abyss. I'm sure it won't hurt.
just got my girl scout cookies. wanna get high?
Look I'm sorry I shaved your cat, but get over it.
It was huge And he was twirling it around. Im telling you, beautiful wonderpenis
Its 10:23 on a monday morning and im craving jello shots, this is a problem
Quick question, when did I develop feelings, and how can I make them go away?
That's two questions.
LEAVE MY LITTLE DICK OUT OF THIS
I'm not sending you pictures to jack off to. That's not what friends do
There is blood on the door to my room, I have to go to sleep
Please tell me that is you having sex in my car in my driveway and not a complete stranger.
After the 3rd time his brother walked in on us I asked "Does he ever knock?" his reply "This is his room"... Turns out he didn't even live there... I feel like a hoe.
Denim handjobs are the worst handjobs. I hate all handjobs. Why do people even.
You are now at the point where people no longer question whether or not you might be on drugs. They now know for certain that you are
if anyone breaks out the olive oil & slip n slide, text me 911.
can jess come too?
sure! but I don't have enough booze for the both of you.
she comes with her own booze, no worries.
Randomize
