I don't know what you were told but i for sure didn't sleep with any one but steve's couch.
Do you think the new Crest Whitestrips Advance Seal would stay on while I give him head? It would be great to knock out 2 things at once...
His text read: Sex? I replied: Not drunk enough. He bought 4 more rounds and tantalized me with the offer pizza later. This could be the beginning of a beautiful relationship.
he came on my stomach and it was 1000 degrees in his car. i smelled awesome.
Hannah wants to know if she cant borrow your stats notes because she threw up on hers.
Woke up this morning buried in a mountain of chex mix and bubble wrap. We must have been doing something great last night
he fell asleep like an hour after we got to the beach, he deserved that penis shaped sunburn.
Who had my phone last night? Whoever it was sent "Fuck you, you're adopted" to half the people on my contact list.
Shouldn't have fucked on the top bunk, I bounced so high my hair got caught in the ceiling fan and almost broke my neck.
Yeah, you gave me a condom that I 100% coulda used, then an hour later you basically beat the shit out of me and physically took it from my pocket.
Is it possible to break your brain with drugs?
I faked more orgasms with him then ever should be allowed for someone this pretty.
I climbed out of the shower to him sitting on the floor trimming his pubes with nail clippers, we both just started laughing at how drunk we were
He told me he needed "space" but then goes and likes my insta of panacakes.. Done.
Why can't you just be normal and get dick pics from your exes like everyone else?
Randomize
