I pretty much can't stop smiling when I talk to you. Even when you talk about disease and infectious diarrhea.
but i am gonna have to have sex w/ him again to get my earrings back
even through the webcam i could tell he was aiming for my face/hair
I told her I was horny and she said to forget it because she has vagina drama.
WHAT IN THE HELL IS VAGINA DRAMA?!
So... i mean if they do have cameras in his apartment buildings pool room atleast we gave them a little show.
He's got a wife and three kids but I'm into being that mistake.
He's basically wearing those Nike boner sweatpants. It's hard not to jump him. How has your day been?
He's carved the words "SLAM STATION" into his headboard...
Every single person in NY is either baking, drinking, or photographing their cat. Reporting live from Instagram.
You're 34. You can't make guys wait till the third date anymore. Step it up!
On the upside, no one went to the hospital! Lex's friend was definitely on fire at one point last night though because he tried to juggle tiki torches. He was shirtless this morning and smelled like a BBQ.
It was 6am and he went immediately for the 69. WTF?? 6am is WAY to early for acrobatics.
Tis the season to play Pocahontas! (AKA: Eat a bunch of acid and run around the yard barefoot, the first person to see the colors of the wind, wins!)
Woke up at my x's house. He said I talked about how much I love panda's for fourty five minutes. Then made him watch The Little Mermaid with me. Made the walk of shame infront of his mom. Things can only really go up from here.
Wait till you get home.
"Uno más" are officially my least favorite words in the entire Spanish language.
Randomize
