like i told you yesterday: virgins, blood, my name. do it.
sometimes i wonder what i would do without sheltered catholic girls w/ overprotective parents
never have sex?
That sucks. I just talked to a telemarketer for 15 minutes about CSI: Miami and weed.
I found them on a couch next to the sidewalk screaming at cars with a megaphone. Kevin chased the mailman with a jello shot.
There was a reason that "Throat Warrior 2011" was written on my martini glass. He said my title was undisputed.
Aaaaand that would be the most of my hand I've ever fit into a vagina before.
I'm gonna go out on a limb and say it had something to do with pool sex.
I can coach you back to consumption. Think of it kinda like Rocky II.
We all make mistakes. Just lock them up deep down inside your mind so they can surface as weird sexual fantasies it takes your therapist years to decipher when your 40
They shoved things up my nose I feel violated
I think I died and satan has brought me back to life and I'm paying for my sins with this hangover
It's only considered alcoholism if you're drinking from something other than a cup....right?
I was not drunk enough for that final.
I don't know why this person would ask for help. It sounds pretty OK to me. Also, I'd steal those bagpipes.
I am drunk shake weighting right now.
Randomize
