i'm sick of taking my pants off and seeing a look of disappointment on the girls face. i want her to be frigthened
Apparently tackling a bar stool and crashing to the floor while yelling for 6 shots of whiskey won't get you thrown out on St Pattys Day.
she screamed"i told you already! counter clockwise spiral and the clockwise spiral!!" right in the middle of sex
wow, i never thought dating a choreographer would be so harsh
She compares her life to Teen Mom. She's 28.
Our new goal for this summer is to fuck so hard we lose his security deposit.
He only dropped the Russian accent after we started having sex.
Where are you? This girl fell on a baby. She is just gone. Please Hurry
I'm hurrying
Dude. She just shit herself.
Would you get mad if I held a "how many dick pics can you get in one night" competition with my friend?
Just had that moment when you realize the two drunk women shoving all their money down your clothes were your middle school teachers...
He refused to pierce my nipples, saying they are the best he's ever seen and that blemishing them would be a crime
I'm still getting random messages from guys about my Halloween outfit. Electrical tape is coming back next year
I think if you have sex on the couch it will psychologically damage it.
No. We can't get pedicures until my toenails grow back.
Testing the emergency boobs hotline
Just had a smooth transition from sexting to buffalo chicken dip 😂😂😂
Your skills amaze me
Randomize
