My family just suggested tequila shots. I had Vietnam style flashbacks.
just saw a man remove a wedgie from his lady's ass. who says chivalry is dead.
we live in such a classy society.
I am telling you that nothing wakes you up like stomach acid exiting your nostrils at 10AM
Do you ever wonder how many people have prayed for you to be a better person?
I just dont understand why you didnt cut me off when I took the funnel into the bathroom and started peeing and funneling at the same time
It was close. I was the girl scoping out where all the garbage cans were located in the class just in case.
This is why you don't heavily drink before 2 midterms.
Thank you for FINALLY joining the Slutasorus Rex club in this conversation.
I'm having salsa con queso and a leftover half-drank/flat red bull for breakfast. Nothing you propose doing today would be a downgrade.
Hahahahaha. That's what your stoned ass gets for eating half a bag of processed cheese at 2am.
Just got a handjob from a 19 year old in front of the Parthenon. The Greek god of debauchery would be proud.
I'm high and dancing to practical magic. Your needs for my penis can wait.
Last thing I remember was a hand in the pants. Then I woke up next to a full beer and a McDouble, which I promptly had for breakfast.
My walk of shame turned into having to get his dad to tow my best friends car out of the snowbank in his driveway
She's in labor and I'm doing shots. Whose the real winner here?
Noo not in a booty call way, in a 'How are your abs and penis doing today?' sort of way.
Randomize
