He said he was just looking at my pictures and was thinking about how he wanted to cut my hair..then dye it black and put platnium blonde extensions throughout it and layer my hair
I don't do stupid things anymore. I do stupid people.
She tried to have sex with him but he quote unquote respected her
Thanksgiving. A stoners favorite holiday
She should get an extra 30 days for that Georgia Rule movie......terrible.
I'm in the bar bathroom about to pass out. But it's ok cause I set my alarm to go off for last call.
I dont know why the TSA people are looking at me wierd. I mean there is no way i am the only hungover college girl here with nine tally marks on her hand and last nights glitter on her face
She started puking and I started running and I swear to god there was a wave of vomit chasing me down the stairs.
Why didn't you tell me I was calling her by her sisters name all night?
I'm on my way back with the wine... And a puppy. It was free.
Doing a small happy dance cause my cocaine successfully went through airport security
I've officially slept with/dated two guys that have gotten tased. What the fuck is wrong with me
All I've done today is nap, eat candy and get off from my vibrator. I didn't know it was possible to be THIS single.
The police report said i was screaming at someone that wasnt there, then the cops told me to call someone sober and i called mike to tell him "They are trying to arrest me for stealing information from the FBI" at that point they took me to jail.
i’n just gonna forge ahead, gag reflex be DAMNED.
Randomize
