Pretty sure she's used to bigger guys. She kept slipping off while on top. like, constantly
it took me 2 minutes to realize that it wasn't HER hand on my penis. First, and worst threesome ever..
I just introduced him to multiple male orgasms. I love wine AND tequila
hes wearing the same tie today that i tied him up with last night.i wanna go home
and then the entire party sang the national anthem a capella around the keg.
Dude that bathroom stall was not tall enough to be doing lines in, guys kept peeking over and giving us high fives
So help my penis see only you. Give him some attention as well.
Whenever I'm hungover I try to stay in public as much as possible, hoping to be a cautionary tale to children. It's a public service, really.
He was hammered and shot his pistol into the lawn. Next thing I know sheriffs are at our house with M4s. He likes to party
Did we seriously just get into a fist fight over kit kats?
Dude. She was wearing nothing but Wonder Woman panties and a flag for a cape and sneaking around leaving PBR's by passed out people for the morning. She called herself the 'Merica Fairy.
Why haven't you proposed already?
You were in the girls bathroom yelling at some random chick because you thought she stole all the urinals. That's why you were kicked out.
WEED BROWNIES! He put weed in my brownie mix! And he got it from YYYYOOOOUUUU!
Look at the bright side mom. After 20 years dad is still capable of surprising you!
Shut up Max.
I ordered from the drive thru as i was peeing on the menu
I will fuck anyone who brings me mcdonalds right now
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