Dood you jacked it to warcraft. you can't come back from something like that
I'm having one of those days where I just want to lay in bed and beat off all day
Every one of her profile pictures looks like an ad for American Apparel. Of course she has syphilis.
I'd bet your vomit would be flammable at this point. Can I try to light it?
We wouldn't be friends if you didn't.
Its... i dont even know. theres lots of rap music and i cant find my shoes
do you think they make 'sorry for walking in on you drunkenly jacking of to a picture of me' cards?
Oh, and i love you too. Im just a selfish dick who had to talk about myself first
Look, I'm just saying... paying ur respects to the neighbors who had a death in the family with food u steal from the neighbors having the cookout may result in a negative karma situation.
Also, no joke, I think that raccoon hair is still in my eye from last night.
At one point 12 people dressed in care bear onesies were up on stage grinding super nasty, and two of the girl Care Bears were making out.
If this wasn't a hallucination, we need to go to this magical kingdom every night of the week.
I find him attractive in the absolute weirdest way. Like I need him to do my taxes, but I also feel like I should spill things on him to gain his attention and then lick it off to gain his affection.
No joke. There's a picture of the priest I made out with on my parents' refrigerator.
just walked passed a black light...apparently he DID cum.
Is it sad the checkout lady had to inform my mom she can't buy alcohol before 8am?
Painted a stripper an elf costume. Her coworkers liked it. Now in a room full of naked strippers.
Randomize