i gave her road head last night, needless to say it wasn't the same and i bit a chunk of the inside of my cheek off.
dude, I just walked in on your little brother changing clothes...I'm ashamed to say I noticed, but that kid has as MASSIVE cock...
Yeah...we all know. it's the elephant in the room at family gatherings.
that is a frighteningly accurate metaphor for it.
This whole foot fetish thing is getting out of control. He would rather hold my feet than me after we fuck.
there are way too many $1s in my wallet for last night to have been 'tame'
were trying to schedule when i can give him head in between classes.
I just had to ask my dad for money to pay for my birth control. I've hit financial rock bottom.
He's covered in dirt and enchiladas. We're going drinking now.
Someone asked me what I was drinking, I was drinking rum, but I was also eating starbursts so i told them "daiquiris"
Finished watching the entire first season of mighty morphing power rangers. Now I have nothing. Not even a life.
He pulled a bucket of fried chicken out of his backpack as a peace offering. Under the chicken was a rainbow bag of weed. We're dating again.
I mean, on what planet are nipples suppose to look like that?
I swear to go if the response she sends me something along the lines of who the fuck is Mark Hamill I might need to brake up with her.
Did I put a bunch of spaghetti on you and then eat it off?!?
That you did
My ex unfollowed me on SPOTIFY bruh. Freaking spotify. The butthurt is real
I miss the pre Covid days when we could meet men in bars. Hitting on guys in the grocery store is just depressing
Randomize
