Just saw a motorized bathtub. I think this college thing is gonna work out.
I JUST REALIZED HOW SOFT YOUR TABLE IS! and I also just started rolling
I just wish I could congratulate your tits on how much I love seeing them
Your either lost or getting food, if your lost find me a girl on your way back, if your getting food grab me a double cheese
Brown or brunette? Ketchup or mustard?
I love you bro
Just broke my collar bone. May not make it to the party.
When in doubt, it's too much cheese
You could be a whistle.. And just ask bitches if they want to blow you all night
Can I borrow your google glasses to make a sex tape?
A guy in a gorilla mask got blown on the lawn. And then the night got weird.
I'm only bisexual one week out of the month. Nothing like ovulation hormones to make the genders of my hookups seem completely irrelevant.
You're talking to someone who was 80% serious about breaking into someone's house and leaving a cat there with our names in a heart tag on its collar
Well you could have stayed home, played house and got blow jobs all weekend babe, but we all have to live with our decision
so evidently blowing a guy does not mean he will say hi to you when he sees you in class.. in case you're ever wondering
So, just how hungover are you?
Not at all, surprisingly.
That has to be your X-Men power.
Fun fact: I came home from the riverboat without my panties. And woke up with a different pair on.
Randomize
