he was pretty good aside from the whole putting his tongue on my butt thing
I have "you made mistakes last night" written alllll over me.
if you really think there are plastic pots safe for the stove i fear for your future landlords.
was his dick as big as our hopes and dreams?
You're mold. I may or maynot have puked blood this morning.
Well u missed Autumn's newly 21 yrs old sister flashing her tits and standing on the bar last night.
You don't understand. There's baclava and there's post sex baclava. You can't compare the two.
Tequila Tuesday.. tonight is the night I defeat the liquor.
I have class at 8:30 and I am not bailing you out of the drunk tank again.
I had to write an apology letter to my roomate for hotboxing in our bathroom. What a bitch.
He's like a unicorn and I just wanna domesticate him
The landlord wasn't even off the porch yet and she was packing a bowl, I can't imagine a better best friend
I'm honestly wondering if my vagina did something to offend the universe
He fingered me to the beat of the Fresh Prince theme song... it was pretty fantastic.
Nice girl until she takes off the fake human suit and shows you the flesh eating demon she truly is
I mean there are real risks associated with having unprotected sex, but I don’t think I need to worry about a ghost possessing me and having unprotected sex while using my body
Randomize
