I just watched Juno. I kind of wish I was in highschool and pregnant
Mom and Dad are dead. Trust fund
Ross. Joey. Chandler. Who would you do?
what if cement was really a rainbow color they just secretly paint it grey so as not to distract drivers
are you high?
I just want to go some place where I can have a nice night. Grind on men who speak no English, make out with a girl, and not feel judged.
I hate about 85% of people that I meet. I'm an awful person. In reality my only redeeming qualities are my face, my amazing scissoring skills and the fact that children love me.
True on all accounts.
That's the second time in a week someone has called me to talk drunk you into getting up off the floor. This needs to stop.
He showed me one of his balls and said "this one's free. you'll have to work to see the other.."
All I remember is this kid kept saying that he has a dream that white kids and black kids can take shots together as one, and just we'd keep drinking to that.
If a girl called me a promiscuous philandering Casanova, should I say thank you?
Most definitely.
Must say, as a couple, she and I are thrilled that our pretend lesbianism has paid off.
Drugs are gluten free tho, right?
I didn't have time to wash my hair yesterday. Ended up spraying some Febreeze on it.
do you think that identical twins have the same size junk? i just want to know your opinion before i find out.
So um... You probably shouldn't post that picture of me and your crotch just because that's a new level of raunchiness that I'm not willing to accept yet
Randomize
