how hairy? two words: wookie tits
my quiz for the book was only 2 questions and my one answer was sorry and then a sad face
It was an igloo shaped doghouse, I was obligated to hotbox it
I really need to learn how to handle sexual advances from older women
I wish I had your problem
I tried to explain to the cop how we all have skeletons in our closets but he just wouldn't listen.
Fantastic. I'm pretty cold, tired, dirty, and hungry, but that comes with an adventurous weekend. Who needs a wallet or keys anyway? I could totally be homeless.
I damn near set my vagina on fire. WHILE The Flaming Lips played in the background. Intensely apropos.
The name of tonight's festivities is hereby decreed to be the "Honey Boo Boo Hootenanny".
I think I will always strangely appreciate as well as kick ass at stoned dishes. Like for the rest of my life. Thank you slave job at Starbucks.
So Bodhi just sent me a pic of someone's balls with a message that says "I hope you all have a ballin' night." I don't even know what level of friendship to call this anymore.
Oh my god.
The ballsiest level.
In the future, could you not call me 'bro' while we're having sex?
This morning confirmed it...there's no maybe about it. She definitely wasn't born with it. It was definitely the Maybelline.
I just saw a guy walking up the stairs with his dick out his pants. I let him know, and he just looked down in shock, laughed, and continued walking up the stairs.
You can only use the "she handcuffed me naked to your bed, i couldn't do anything, sorry bro" excuse once.
You have a tempurpedic. you only have you to blame.
yeah, last night we handcuffed you and you started crying saying that you weren't a bad person
Randomize
