But if ***** wants to get filthy... Tell her to throw a text my way ;)
White Russians with skim milk. Fuck I'm healthy.
Just spent 45mins blow drying a joint i dropped in a beer....i felt like i dropped his infant child....
Walked in on my boss having phone sex at work... and somehow this didnt bother nor embaress him
Do you think i can prewrite an apology on friday and leave it vague enough to just finish on sunday?
I'm not considering your visit a success until we've fucked every cock in the ethnic rainbow...between the four of us we should have it done by x-mas
Halloween is the only night where I would ever end up getting a guy's makeup all over my face
Dumb decision of the night...walking home drunk and smelling my pepper spray
Are you good with a knife? I need someone to perform amateur surgery.
I want to tell you your future: you're going to be having sex
Please don't explain what tea bagging is to my mother.
I just made myself orgasm twice and Laura lee hit 4 million subscribers. It’s a good day everywhere
I possibly am a tad bit not really but maybe slightly intoxicated.
I currently don't understand fingers.
Mom says you're allowed to come home if you replace the towels. I don't want to know why.
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