What I dont get about To Catch a Predator is who the fuck still uses chat rooms?
Her vagina smelled like hockey gear.
The girl next to me in class is taking notes on woman's suffrage with a girls gone wild pen.
I just had my first non-cocaine-induced nosebleed for the first time in 2 years. This calls for a celebration.
I think it's god's punishment for my behavior in Vegas . Lies were told. Angels were defiled. Pools were pissed in
The second time he came it projectile shot in my ear
We were in a spooning position and it shot all the way up. He was like sorry. Physics.
I cunt my lip shaving. That's not a typo, it's a placement clue
I feel like I'm pretty optimistic for a girl that might be pregnant.
His girlfriend left him for the pizza guy. I am not fucking kidding.
I just shaved my pubes into a heart shape. if that doesn't scream romantic idk what does
MY LIFE IS A TRAINWRECK THATS ON FIRE BUT SOMEHOW STILL MOVING, I HAVE THE RIGHT TO SCREAM OUTSIDE AT 2AM
In other news, I tore a tendon in my hand from giving my boyfriend handjobs so that's how my day is going
Currently doing the walk of shame out of some random girls house with my boyfriend. Talk about relationship goals.
Oh god I just had an orgasim riding my bike. I need to get laid pronto.
I had a dream I hooked up with Post Malone. I can still smell the dream
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