Firetruck pulls up, fireman jumps out n knocks on my door, asks "do you know where Johnny lives?"
Is your delayed response due to the massive amount of judging going on?
She laid down on my bed and played "I want you to want me" on my laptop. subtle.
The boys are giving me the exam answers and I don't even have to expose my body..yayy engineering!
found out the liquor store price matches. thus begins senior year of college
ok, just found out the kid i had random sex with in April was on wheel of fortune so i can really no longer say i regret that night
WERE YOU GOING TO TELL ME THERE WAS A LOAF OF BANANA BREAD IN THE OVEN BEFORE YOU LEFT FOR A 5 HOUR SHIFT??
Not only is it unacceptable to be bar hopping alone at 5 o'clock. It is definitely unacceptable to do so with a lobster
Every single item that was in my fridge is now in my hot tub. Please help
It's hard to hold down the snapchat button for video while thrusting. Sorry if the cinematography wasn't Oscar-worthy.
So shaving my butt whilst humming "be prepared" is now in my top five weirdest Friday night activities.
I still don't know his name but his ass is spectacular. Like he should never wear pants.
Really need a jack off emoji
Who do we write to about that?
Looks like it rained condoms in my room last night
Spotify says I’m in the top 1% of Indigo Girls fans worldwide. Didn’t know I would peak this early.
Aren’t you trying to seem...less lesbian?
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