Dude. I haven't taken a shit in a week.
Try anal, it works wonders.
I totally just used John Mayer's lyrics to get laid.
is it true that cum stays in you for 7 years?
that's gum
It's like alcoholism for beginners at my kitchen table.
I wish there was a non slutty way to ask the guys across the hall if i can copy their men's bathroom key so I have one for my one night stands
I'll probably regret it tomorrow. But right now, accepting this $2000 credit card so that I can finance booty calls from across the united states sounds like a golden idea.
I told him I had to grab my Swedish fish from the car before they froze. Then I just left. But the fact that he knew how important it was not to have my fish freeze almost made me come back in....almost.
On a lighter note, my mom and I were playing scattergories, and for "things that you keep hidden" we both put dildo. Proof that we really are related.
It's a good cause. For your vagina.
I like literally had a visual image of his penis going into your soul
It's snowing in May and there was a law school party at the strip club. The end is near.
Is it considered a bad morning to find your boss half naked in the parking lot of work at 7am?
That depends, how hot is your boss?
He's like a computer from 2001 in a 2014 world. It just doesn't work. Lots of glitches.
Sigh. I'll find the right guy one day.
Prince charming is right around the corner and will be freaky as shit!
I dont understand why i cant be a wizard
Randomize