Anything crazier than usual happen? I woke up in a stairway with my cock out.
my Prof for my bio lab has his lab coat collar popped. it's 8 am and im too hungover for this guy
entire chemistry final was about beer... i actually might miss this place
mom found the triscuts in her underwear drawer, its done.
Did someone do a keg stand in my bathtub?
Im having a christmas reunion party tonight. Last year i ate my own contact. We'll see how this year goes
I went on my dinner date pretending that my lunch date didn't jizz in my hair.
It feels like eating ice cream while riding a unicorn over a rainbow waterfall made of glitter.
That is possibly the gayest thing that was ever thought of by anyone anywhere.
i was really disappointed no one would drink beer from our cleavage last night except for us
If he can forgive your lousy blowjobs, you can ignore his terrible driving.
Ack! That is the first dick pic I've ever received. A) congrats B) that is way grosser than I ever thought t would be.
I feel like I should have backed off when "I love you" came out on the third date. Now I'm in her bed wondering which door my shrine is behind. Fuck.
also, sleeping with your chipotle guy sounds like a good idea until you want chipotle on your day off and have to look somewhat presentable to acquire said chipotle.
I just wanna fuck your brother. Sorry if thats a crime.
He climbed on the counter and announced it was time for something called The Cocktacular and all the girls immediately left. He cockblocked the entire fraternity!
Randomize