I fuked that chick last night and she kept saying, "oh...oh....oh", like Bill Lumberg
so what did you do?
I did the mash I did the monster mash It was a graveyard smash!
Hey was my sperm eye the same day I crapped myself?
I cant remeber how long i've been laying here...it could be 10 minutes to a fucking day
I was wasted and lost so I called the cops and asked for directions. It seemed logical at the time
I'm going to email her once I get off the bathroom floor
I'm about to play Thunderstruck by myself, that way I'll always get the long thunder part.
it wasnt even considered partying. it was like "ok, who can get the most shitfaced and not pass out"
You're the horniest male I have ever encountered
Makes it sound like you're a scientist documenting your discoveries. I warned you.
I dressed up as a "typical white girl" which meant I wore my yoga pants and uggs all night. BEST. IDEA. EVER. Most comfy halloween everrrr.
he was high. i was rolling face. we were both wearing grateful dead t shirts. at that point it's like we had no choice but to fuck
So I woke up alone in the hotel room clutching a bible to my chest. Explain, please.
I noticed while having sex on Friday that I have great endurance. CrossFit works.
What exactly is it about Doctor Who thigh high socks with a matching shirt that says "take me I'm yours!"
I forgot that I'm high because of how high I am.
Can’t. Tonight’s a netflix and dick night
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