I said ACK before Andy Samberg made it even remotely funny. That tool is stealing all my lines.
Yeah, you've definitely been jizzing in your pants years before he made it socially acceptable
normally i'm against accepting campers on facebook but this one saw me giving head to another counselor and didn't say shit about it to my boss so i feel like shes earned the right to look at my sloppy drunk pictures
Ill bet we could have atleast fucked a girl who fucked a guy who has fucked tara reid. That's a famous circle right?
the cops didn't wanna shut the tailgate down but the strippers weren't allowed to take money without a license or somthing
and yes i will spend 10 dollars on a vibrating toothbrush to masturbate but not a calculator for my test
Come, dress lightly, bring tequila...
Want to come over? I'm getting stoned and watching Netflix and making s'mores over a candle in my room
Well, I've taken the art of car peeing to new heights
Well he fell three stories from the balcony and still had the strength to fuck me for 2 hours.
You in for a dick vacation?
YES, even though I have no idea what that means
I went to a community college and majored in Bad Decisions. I'm not exactly a chick magnet.
I'm gonna chug this bud light an might injure this high school penis, like I'm 17 again
I hope you get stoned and think that you're a seal in shark infested waters
Oh, in response to your "does dating get better" question...I feel like penises are getting smaller nowadays. Its been several years since I saw a good 8+ incher.
HE PEED ON ME. THE MANAGER OF THE BAR.
Randomize
