I haven't had sex in so long I'll probably find some stranger, feel guilty, go w/o sex for several months and do it all over again...always something to look forward to
i wonder if detective benson from law and order takes those handcuffs home. i bet she does.
then I woke up and felt a boner that wasn't even mine. never taking 3am vodka again
I found a knife in my bed when I got back this morning. I think one of my roommates has it in for me
Packing for the trip... do they take Visa in South Dakota?
my brother walked in while we were fucking, silently took my bong from my closet, saluted us and walked out.
The new google images is a smorgasbord of porn now are plans for tonight are off.
i've never smoked before...when you said wake and bake i thought you meant like a funeral bbq or something
Next time when I try to seductively eat onion rings while drunk remind me of tonight.
So that wine I told you about is vile...
That the stuff you brewed in your dorm closet? Are you actually going to drink it?
Yup. It's drinkable. Might go blind, but I've got to use my chemistry minor for something.
I remember nothing except the fact it happened and I ate doritos and we highfived a lot
Just so you know, a 6'7" tall gay man, with a martini in one hand and a fairy wand in the other, is not a force to be reckoned with...don't ask.
Wasn't his fault he kicked a hole in the wall, they should have never tried to give him a bath after tequila.
I smoked out of two pipes at the same time while my friends wielded the lighters last night. It felt like I graduated to the next level of stoner.
The dick pic bandit just sent me a poem about showering..
Randomize
