i'm telling everyone you had sex with a puerto rican drug lord
By the end of the second bowl I was making sound effects to every hand movement he made.
Is it bad everytime a fat person orders fraps I want to tell them to slow their rolls
This girls a $30 bar tab from being bi
Either this is the best sandwich I've ever had, or my stomach is just relieved to have something in it that's not Red Bull or semen.
She said she couldn't sleep with a guy who had blood stains on his ceiling. I tried to explain it wasn't my blood, but she still left :(
When exactly does a bender just become a lifestyle?
we had break-up sex in a port-a-potty. how do you think it went?!
No padding. I spent my whole summer with my nips out. October don't need that too.
If the fate of the world hinged on some chubby girl getting laid, the president would dispatch me with a fifth of Jameson immediately and then rest easy.
No. You're getting a Viking funeral and I'm pawning your shit.
Naked and Afraid: Hangover edition
Matched with the lumberjack. Here's your wedding invite.
What happened last night? I'm too scared to get out of bed and see the destruction.
First of all, check to see if that naked guy is still alive. He didn't look to be breathing when I left
WHY DON'T YOU WANT TO BE MY ESKIMO BRO
Randomize
