it was nice. we just kind of hung out. she didnt even mention the farting incident.
You tend to look at life differently when you wake up to nutella vomit all over your room with no recollection of how it got there
You know how to spell recollection?
I love memorial day. It's drinking in the name of patriotism. God Bless America
i have rugburns grass stains and some road rash. im an all terrain slut
Guy in our group took down a chick in a wheelchair last night.
I've discovered that regular handcuff keys, sadly, do not work on real police handcuffs.
I've never danced to a Michael Jackson song in a bar and left alone bro. Something in girls loves a guy who dances to mj
I think they were making kool-aid in my bed. There is lots of sugar and my hands and face are stained blue.
Please, take the 2 shots of vodka that I left as an apologie.
I'll just save you what dignity you have left by letting what happened die with your lack of memory and/or liver.
Come over so we can have two person sex in this one person tent
I'll come hang out with you guys later, but right now my parents aren't home and I have to take full advantage of being able to watch porn on full blast.
What exactly do I say to a random stoner hookup to thank him for ending my dry spell? Is it awkward to just say "Thanks for that. It was well needed."
if i dont text back till morning its cause i turned my phone off and changed my password to something i wont remember to stop myself from drunk texting...RESPONSIBILITY
She's dancing around licking a fork of nutella. She is not sober.
Randomize
