spencer pratt says his family invinted chess
that kid is like the al gore of hollywood.
I got oddly confused when she started talking in third person in bed.
we were doing it doggy-style and i felt him pop that pimple on my back.I have mixed feelings about it
She told me I had to leave by four. We fucked until six thirty and we are the champions played on the way home. Yeah god knew
And then you gave the bride a high five and said "Go forth and Consummate."
For a second, I wondered if I could smoke pizza.
hey remember that 14 year old i met 5 years ago who i said i would bang 5 years from then?
Yup.
Tell me you remember me getting a tampon from the girl throwing up in the next stall
An open call to all exes! i have a drunk text policy that requires i delete any and all texts after drink 3, however i have reason to believe i have done something stupid. if i have texted you that "I love you", "miss you" and/or conveyed any interest in getting back together with you in the last 24 hours i was belligerent and lying. That is all.
I woke up and he was starring at me and then said "do you believe in miracles"?
I'm like 80% sure we nearly got arrested because we threw fireworks at a car
I'm jealous that you can use my boobs as pillows & I can't.
BTW car sex works all the muscle groups. Just sayin. Legs/butt are sore as are arms, back and core.
Sex in a hot air balloon, top that one!
Dude. Craziest ride ever. I was convinced that the bus was an airplane. There were clouds when I looked out the window. I got really upset every time the bus turned because airplanes shouldn't turn.
Randomize