Cold hands, warm shart.
Is it just me or do I always seem to have cum in my bellybutton?
his receeding hairline makes running into him so much less awkward. almost enjoyable actualy
The state of Wisconsin is just irresponsible for letting me buy this many fireworks
walking on campus just saw the exact moment some kids life got ruined
he's on the phone and just starts going "FUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUCCCCCCCCKKKKK", then follows it with "Are you sure your pregnant?"... made my day
You demanded I give you a glass of water, so I set it down in front of you and you knock it over and roll in it..,
I wanted to be a dolphin.
I've thrown up in front of nearly every customer we've had today.
Here's the thing, you got road head in two different cars tonight. You feel lucky yet?
Though my hair looks fantastic i will unfortunately have to turn down your 4am sex offer
There's glitter in my speakers, piles of cheezits on the floor, a random Audi in the driveway and a homeless dude napping in a lawn chair in the backyard. Wtf happened last night?
I'm filtering his penis picture so I can see it better
That was the night I realized I need to grow up and stop eating mushrooms with strange 40 year old men in convertibles.
I learned so much in Pittsburgh
Pornhub is actually a very wholesome website
if being 21 means slamming 99 cent margaritas at 3:00 in the afternoon on a Tuesday then call me Peter Pan IM NEVER GROWING UP
All I know is I woke up in the back seat of my car, with the engine on, and my gps navigated to florida.
Randomize
