If she doesnt understand your inherent need to teabag an emo chick, do you really want to be with her?
I JUST REALIZED HOW SOFT YOUR TABLE IS! and I also just started rolling
some fat dude with wolverine facial hair just walked out of your room with a snuggie. explanation needed.
I gave you head at the stadium on a Thursday night ESPN game. That damn well better be worth points on the score board!!!
Just so were clear I meant the head your face is on
His penis is small and he doesnt like Harry Potter. HE HAS NO REDEEMING QUALITIES WHAT AM I EVEN DOING HERE
I've discovered the best way to avoid rehab is to not fuck fat chicks when your drunk, therefore delaying regrets and rock bottom
your the Dr. Phil in my life
Today is an unchanging day
She pushed me over. She offered me a shot from her tits. We're good now
Was just told that I slept on the counter using a loaf of bread as a pillow. Clearly my life is going well.
he has pokemon bedsheets but his dick is huge so i took one for the team
ALSO I MAYBE ACCIDENTALLY HAND CUFFED MYSELF TO A CHAIR
No, gay couples have the same problems straight ones do; I wish that we could go back to the days when he would shit with the door closed.
Only I could turn my one night stands into class essays. Go me.
Who brings a stripper to breakfast at the dining hall? What was the plan? Impress her with his meal plan?
they just got in argument over who had more of your dick pics. quit sending shit to my sisters fucker
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