He's on drugs...like drugs for horses.
He said he's gonna start calling me "Benny" because we're "friends with bennyfits"
you know that saying beer then liquer makes you sicker, it should be beer then pickles makes you throw up alot, everywhere.
Just because he's a soilder doesn't mean his dick is a hero.
Who topped off the "random beer mix" beer bong with a pinch of pepper?? All you could taste was busch and pepper...
98% is good enough for me. Kinda like birth control. Worth the risk
when you wake up try not to move. we are betting to see if more sprinkles stuck to you or the pong table.
I woke up naked in my bathtub at 5:30 this morning. There's legit a spray tan body print of me in the fetal position in my tub.
Pretty sure I'm going to hell because of our friendship
Last one there wins
Cover your phone. Photos of streaking frat guys incoming.
Yeah we do. It needs to be like a good penis- long, substancial, and able to make people cry.
I just want nice things and good sex
I FOUND THE LEGS
My life is far to together for someone who's such a hot mess inside
I just watched your fat stupid son get hit by a Prius. Ran right in front of it. He's all right . But... Maybe you should have taught him to look both ways like a responsible parent does.
Randomize
