it hurts more in the daytime
The most interesting things happen to you when your pants come down. I truly envy you.
Oh well. haha. i couldn't really understand what she was saying. i just nodded a lot. i guesss she found that sexy.
gotta love spring break
gotta love slutty girls from the south
I just made my bed perfectly before realizing that I'll be too drunk to appreciate it tonight
Some fat girl belted her graduation gown. That is not a good look for anyone.
I think I pulled my groin stumbling back from the bar. That or the hippo I woke up next to.
Well yes but because of that incident i now salute to truck drivers
At least I look tastefully trashed. My nipples are hidden and I'm standing up.
I can't blame him for thinking that then, placing a cone shaped potato chip on the tip of his penis post bj is not a normal act of love
You can't play that off as role play thing. You held my hips and kept yelling "put a baby in me!" That shit ain't cool.
multiple people will be seeing my nips tonight. not mad about it at all
When he wakes up tomorrow with half shaved legs smelling like a preteens bathroom, I'm sure he will think he has had a great evening
I would drive 12 hours round trip for you to have an orgasm, cause that's friendship
I'M IN A SPINNING VORTEX OF SELF-HATRED AND HORNINESS
My boss is paying me to come clean his house in a maid outfit and told me not to tell anyone....this is shady as fuck but I need the money
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