question - sack: should she or should she not play with it during foreplay?
i make out with random ppl when i drink he shouldnt feel special
I just spent the last 30 minutes shaving my asshole.
It just sucks seeing everyone get flowers but me...
yeah, but they die. it takes a while, but they die. just like all of these kids relationships will. tequila doesnt die. its a live in the moment thing... like a valentines day one night stand. so long run, tequila is the better gift.
Why do I have peacock feathers super glued to my body?
Please never let me the drunk fat dancer in the bus girl
I'm drinking wine from the cap of my laundry detergent container, wearing my bed sheet as a cape. How do you think I'm taking it?
You were telling me last night 101 proof was nothing and you needed 400 proof or better yet military or marine proof, because you're marine grade.... You rascal.
I'm puking in a turkey pan....
I also woke up on my floor. Naked. On a pile of clothes. With my head in the trash can. And a sheet over me.
There is nothing wrong with watching parks and rec all day then getting blackout drunk by night
You'll be happy to know that the bruise is gone from my cock
We do have a rich storied history of emotional warfare
I just left and he walked me out and went call me if you're ever... Eh... Whatever. And walked away.
Hi darlin, what are you doing tonight?
.... Things I will not be proud of
I'm cuddly bitch. Deal with it.
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