who do you think you are?
someone who doesn't ask that question
Just kissed her with a dip in my mouth... She was either too drunk to notice or too cool to care
she's walking down the hall in a thong and one flip flop and one ugg
At what point in your drunken state would you actually believe that the cops wanted to party with you?
No no I got the black eyes when I tried to do a flip off the second deck of a pontoon boat. Actually when I did a flip, it was a success.
He had to carry me to the car. But then sat with me and waited for me to sober up enough to have sex. He's a keeper.
Is it too early to start a donation jar for my 4th of july hospital bills?
So i know i shouldnt being spending random large amnts of money...but i just bought a sword.
WE SHOULD FUCK TWO GUYS THAT LIVE TOGETHER
THAT WOULD BE SO CONVENIENT WE COULD CARPOOL
So on a scale from 1-10 how gross is it that I used mortuary makeup on my own face?
That moment during finals day when you either convince your teacher to let you out of the room or you shit you pants.
He literally lured me in the house with his cat then we ended up fucking on the living room couch while the cat just sat there and watched
he was like tryna hang and chat and I was like dude there's an iguana in this room
I took a picture of you last night while you were drunk, trying to smoke a bowl through your nose. It's now your contact id.
If by whore you mean UPGRADE....then yes I am
Randomize