I am looking at the epitome of fake boobs right now
I sometimes wonder how many of the girls I know have done anal...and why none of them have ever dated me.
I think he just gave me the 'I used to sleep with your sister' discount
He had a beer bottle in each of his back pockets and was on rollerblades. All I remember is following him for about 10 minutes
Yes I was being legit. That's the only plant I want in my house. A growing penis.
I had to rush to my room and get my vibrator off my bed i didn't want him to know how long it's been since I had a decent fuck.
We didn't even make it to the door before they came out saying we weren't allowed in because of last time..
I paid your cover too so you're on the list as tits mcgee. You're welcome :D
Didn't want you to think it had been open season on my vagina since we broke up.
I was afraid she wouldn't be able keep up but I woke up in a bathtub, she called me a pussy and made me pancakes.
I just paid my school fees like a real adult who doesn't get accidentally drunk on a Tuesday night
Alternately I could tell him western classical is just a series of events that had to happen for music to reach the point where Beyoncé was able to pen drunk in love, which is the pinnacle of humanity's artistic achievement thus far
You can't just drop that I might be walking into a foursome and leave it at that
she threw up on her exam, awkwardly wiped it off with her sleeve and continued writing.
My FIANCE just told me he thought you were the prettiest out of all my friends YOU WHORE
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