When I saw him standing at full height, I realized exactly how much his body structure reminds me of his penis.
i think the next time he gets me off i'm going to scream bangarang
ru fi oooo
That's what happens when you let Keystone Light make your decisions.
why do my parents always seem to be having way more sex than i do?
I just pulled the condom that i lost on tues out of me at work ewwww!
CNN just did a special on how to do heroin safely.. I recorded it for us
so whats your words to drink to for the state of the union? mine are 'change' 'fight' and 'you know'.
mine is 'the'.
I appreciate the offer. Swallowing pride is much like swallowing cum, difficult and unpleasant
I just picked up my chili cheese fries off the ground ate them, and then licked up the cheese that was still on the concrete. Thank you Jagerbombs
She just admitted to me that she was a pinecone.
you know you have a brother who cares when he hands you a piece of pizza before you pass out from too many bong hits
It's snowing in May and there was a law school party at the strip club. The end is near.
Someone keeps hanging up bible verse posters in the bathroom stall I masturbate in at work.
i don't know what it is about you being around kids that makes me want to screw your brains out
That is the creepiest and also the sexist thing you've ever said
i think it's like a sexual celebration of not having kids
If I wanna spend the whole night tied up and getting railed I'm allowed to do so
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