I may have a concussion but the symptoms are the same as a hangover so I can't tell. Best 21st ever.
she was home schooled till college. were she learned how to give the most amazing blowjobs is still a mystery.
Just hooked up with a girl I met in line at Taco Bell. I told you leave me to do my own thing and I'll get it in
I seriously think the toilet is the cleanest thing in their house. At least if I have to worry its not about that.
My doctor actually said I was suffering from an "acute hangover" in doctor's note I asked him for....what a douche
You guys I wore sweatpants to work today because I simply forgot to put on real pants and I had a weed brownie and a juice box for breakfast. I am not ready for parenting.
I got a charlie horse in my ass while masturbating. We are never been going to that boot camp again.
I am rewearing my dress from last night. I only wore it for like two hours before fucking. And I took it off first so no cock contact. This is my new standard of cleanliness.
Listen, some people have dreams, some people just want to cock slap a kangaroo
My mom's yelling at me for being a whore and my dad's quizzing me on how to drive in winter weather....I'm home!
I haven't even lived here for 24 hours yet, and I've already banged someone. My new hoe life is off to a great start.
How ironic... opening your legs for closure.
He was calculating the number of ceiling tiles when I was on top it was fucking rain man.
Just realized that I indirectly pay for sex through my cable bill
Wow. He is an expensive lay
I still have to figure out the cost per lay. It could be a financially sound investment
What does "mood AF" mean?
Mood as fuck.
Why did you comment that on a video of a gorilla throwing its own shit?
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