I wanna do crazy things to you in a tent
fuckk wrong person
.. who was that for? a girlscout?
Don't feel obligated to get back to me but I think I just fell in love with a middle aged waitress at the Dennys in waco. She's used but in good condition.
i just dont know how to see an unattractive person as more than a friend
new revelation: five guys for breakfast
new revelation: previous revelation not a good revelation
did you fuck him yet?
hahaha who do you think your talking to.. a nun?
No, the weekend was great. It was the waking up in the pond in the raft without an oar that sucked. That fucking water is cold at 7am.
Maybe it was silver. I don't know. I was drunk sifting through my dogs vomit.
How could you not respond to a text containing the words "goat man" ?!?
True enough. Do you ever think that these girls grandparents ghosts are watching you masterbate to their granddaughters and look at you in Shame?
Look bro I'll go half per boob with you, we split her.
Jasmine is diving into bushes again.
I heard you shushing me, but my screaming orgasm drowned it out.
is it sad that a disney movie is making me horny?
Sometimes you have good days, sometimes m you delete 360 screenshots off your camera roll.
A Valium induced mom decided to walk into my bedroom this morning without knocking. Guess what I was doing? FML
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