my entire walk over here no one looked in my eyes. Period Boobs are BAACKKK.
How could you not be happy? Its like "and then I found 5 dollars" but "and then I found a handle of vodka"
It's like a bag of dicks covered in taint sweat pounding a pregnant baby walrus.
Given everything we have talked about, is it wrong to ask you to be faithful to me, despite still dating him?
Is it some european holiday today? We both woke up to find loaves of bread in our rooms...
He just had a handle of vodka with ice in it yelling at people hot august night mother fuckaaaaa and was pouring it on his face
Like her Facebook page isn't even hers. It belongs to her tits. It's Titsbook
You shouldn't do laundry high cus pink.
What I'm saying is DOWNGRADE. Like, do you see the caps lock?
When we were having sex last night, I told him I would replace him with tacos
He made me a flamingo drink and now I don't know why things are the way they are.
We were making eye contact while i was throwing up.
Last night I had a dream that I changed my last name to Vodka. what does that say about my life?
You shouted “im bobby labonte!” In the process of shoutgunning a beer. He said you were too redneck for him...
Forget about letting a 70-year-old man suck on my tits for coke... telling my new boyfriend about it was the poor life choice.
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