Help. Asians are flirting in front of me(773): They speak asian
I have the worst farts today, I'm walking by the cubicles of people I don't like and leaving them surprises. Brb.
he just told me his nickname was "nickexplodeon"
does that mean he doesn't last long?
How do I put "special brownies" into Weight Watchers?
can I come stay the night
yeah, but no sex tonight
I'll stay home
He was carrying a rolled up carpet saying he was saving it for tomorrow's Walk of Fame.
I fucked her and then she made me sleep on the floor next to her bed because she 'has a committment problem'
mary just dropped the yahtzee dice in her wine. and shes throwin em like shes on a craps table.
hahahaha slap the bag.
Yep and i guess after he came back from that he sat down next to me and i just put my hand right on his penis just casually like it was his leg
You are NEVER going to guess whose penis was JUST in my mouth!!!
I'll give you a hint, we ate paste with him in kindergarten.
WHY DIDN'T YOU INVITE ME TO RUN THROUGH TACO BELL'S SPRINKLERS AT 4AM?!
I went to Walmart last night to buy some CDs--which is a sentence I never thought I'd say in 2016.
just woke up on the floor with a bottle in my hand. and by bottle, i mean a baby bottle. half filled with tequila.
I just don't think it's that outlandish to ask that I don't get messages from my husband at 8:30pm on a Wednesday telling me he peed on our cat
Say thank you and give him a blowjob.
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