I like you better when you drink
I like you better when I drink too
i thought i was pinching her nipple. It was her mole
You can call me Bill Clinton. I brought 2 good looking Asians home last night.
Needless to say Beer Gardens severly frowns upon playing flip cups with real glasses.
Lets get really high and only speak Spanish to each other again tonight
Just saw someone buying TWO six packs of O'Doul's. WHY ??
This guys mom bought us a 24 pack and drove me and 8 others to a frat house... Hello moms weekend.
I cnant read. Cheetos goen. Help. Grt Cheetos.
She needs to go. She is like the Yoko Ono of our group.
She asked if she should pack the condoms, I told her I plan on drinking so much that it won't be possible.
No one should ever be so high that they forget the food. That's just...its a violation of God and Nature, of the very laws that we live by!
I think you just described to us the most perfect drunken fairy tale that has somehow never been written
Also, I found this app that is basically a tamagochi from the 90's and now I finally have something to keep me busy at work!
My last Google search was 'can an impotent man have sex'. I don't even want to know what I did with that guy.
She totals her lexus and all she wants is to have crazy wild sex.
Randomize