Its about time the women of america have a president they can masturbate to again
May i just say it is extremely difficult to pee in a cape
Apparently 151 is to me what spinach is to popeye.
you never realize your highschool teachers are real people till you fuck one of them
They poured beer (3 cans) down the toilet so bubbles can be drunk in fishy heaven
Safe to say I relapsed into my old chatroulette drunk flashing days.
no, she just came home, mumbled about being a gerbil out of water then ate half cooked chicken nuggets.. normal night
me blowing you awake is the exact turn i want our relationship to take
Whiskey and an unstable home life is apparently the fountain that 20-something boys like to drink from.
Am I really that high, or did I just spray febreeze outside ?
The bachelor party was supposed to stay local but I think were in mexico.
He reached a whole new level of creepy. We were getting a coffee and he noticed the girl at Starbucks name tag looked her up on fb and friend requested her right there without ever introducing himself
I wish I knew the extent of my injuries before I climbed over the fence. Might have avoided the need to purchase a cupholder for my wheelchair.
I mean, it's a romantic picture of pubes if I've ever seen one
Clearly the Stanley Cup Finals good luck hand job IS necessary. You let the whole team down.
Randomize
